Wasps are great teachers and mentors. They know how to protect themselves like true warriors.

​A warrior is not someone, who invades other lands to conquer them and take what is not theirs, but someone who protects and defends his or her family, people and those who cannot defend or protect themselves. 

Wasp says, “Whatever is in your way, whatever you are going through, makes you grow!” and calls you to stay passionate and persevere. Whatever you have experienced in your past, was a step on the path to your dream. Focus and you will find the fire within your heart, that has been ignited by your spirit. Use it to craft the tools necessary to bring your dream into being.

One day, when I was called back into the Native American settlement beyond the veils, where the council of shamans gathers, I was asked to sit together with a shaman, I know in this lifetime and who I love very much, and the Eldest, to discuss a personal matter.

The jokester that I am, I had mused about the fact that I had felt like a spring chicken, when I had met the Eldest for the first time a long time ago, and my mind had come up with the English phrase “old codger” in regards to him, when I was writing about my first meeting with him a a few years ago.

When we had finished discussing matters, the Eldest said solemnly, “Old Codger has spoken.”

​I froze and looked at him wide-eyed. I knew that my thoughts were my own, but I often spoke to the Great One aloud, praying, talking about matters that were on my mind and sometimes I talked about my journeys, what I had felt and learned, reflecting about what I had been shown about myself.

Had I talked aloud about how it had felt, meeting the Eldest and sensing the difference in age and experience?

One of the instruments I use, when I am having a healing ceremony with someone, is the Native American flute. The songs I play are never the same. I play the song I hear in the heart of the one standing in front of me and when the healing ceremony has ended, the old song goes with Sister Wind to the Great One. The heart starts singing a new and powerful song and the old one leaves with Sister Wind. It makes way for the new. A song only stays with me for a while longer, if there is more to be seen or done at a later point in time.

When I was still living in Vienna, I often played the flute in the evenings. One day, when I was playing again and my heart started singing together with my flute, I was called on a journey beyond the veils. It started with a memory of one of my past lives in North America. I have spent many lifetimes there. That particular lifetime I had been a soldier and commanding officer of a military base, a fort. I had remembered parts of it before and the journey started with the memories that had already come back to me at another point of time.

I had come back to my fort from a meeting with other officers that had taken more time than expected and was told, that a group of Native Americans had been captured. When I asked why, the soldier reporting had no answer for me. I went to the barracks, where the they were held captive to have a look for myself.

What I saw made me white-hot angry. There were elders and children, they had not been given any food or water and some of them were sick. There was a young girl and when I realized what the men had done to her, I knelt down next to her and gave her healing.

It was not a conscious act, for that lifetime I did not remember that I was a healer, because there were other tasks to fulfill on my path. When I looked up, I looked straight into the eyes of an old medicine man and shaman. I felt as if he knew me and recognized me, but I had never seen him before.

I got up and told my men in no uncertain terms to get food, water, blankets and the field medic, the doors were not to be locked and closed again, for every single human being in there was free to leave whenever they pleased. They had done nothing wrong. Then I went looking for the men responsible. They had disobeyed my orders and broken the military code of conduct. The people native to the land we had come to, were to be treated with respect. We were soldiers and there were duties to perform, but they entailed protecting and defending, not murder. I found them drinking and playing cards. I had them court-martialed.
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Friends of the soldiers that had been brought to justice for their actions ended my lifetime a few months after that.

All of a sudden, my surroundings changed completely and I found myself in a Native American settlement. I had been there many times before. It is the place where the council of shamans gathers. The shamans that take part in the meetings appear in their light form. Some of them I know, some of them are incarnated right now, others observe, dream and teach in the spirit realms.

I was sitting on my heels in the middle of their circle, not because it had been asked of me, but simply because it felt comfortable. They were smiling and one after the other, the shamans stood up and came to me. One by one they looked into my eyes and then they gave me their breath.

Then one shaman I had not seen during my visits to the settlement before, came towards me. He was the last. I had always felt as if I was ancient, but when I looked at him, I felt like a newborn soul. He was old, older than any being I had ever encountered, his face weatherworn and wrinkled and I felt nothing but love emanating from him. He wore an incredibly beautiful headdress.

​He smiled at me and took a feather out of his headdress. He fastened it in my hair. Then he put both his hands on my cheeks, looked into my eyes and said, “You are shaman.” Then he kissed me on my forehead and gave me his breath.

The Lion and the Lioness are protectors and guardians that lead with grace and dignity, justice and honor, for they know that power comes with responsibility: A leader is not the one getting everything served on a silver platter eating first, a leader is the first servant of the people and the pride he or she has been entrusted with.  ​

Feathers bear many meanings and finding feathers that are intended for you, is always significant.

When I started to walk this path, I would find feathers left and right. Each time finding a feather would coincide with understanding a part of my path and my learning. I was still living in Vienna and Vienna is a city that lots of birds call their home. There are large murders of crows and ravens and pigeons can be found everywhere. So naturally, there are a lot of feathers to be found.

Whenever I saw a feather, I knew if it was intended for me or not. Most of the time, the crows were the friends, that gifted me their feathers. Depending on what I had understood or learned, I would find tail, wing or contour feathers, sometimes even semiplume or down.

I loved it and one winter day, I told a colleague at work about it. He was interested in things like that and read the tarot himself. He looked at me and said, “This is Vienna. There are feathers everywhere. That is just a coincidence.” I looked at him and said, “No, there is always a reason why I find feathers. I know that.” He just shook his head.

Back then I was still teaching German as a foreign language and that day, a colleague of mine got sick. I was asked, if I could substitute and teach her class. Her classroom was in a part of the building I only went to, when I would substitute, so I had never been in her classroom before.

On my way there I was thinking about what my colleague had said and came to the conclusion, that it did not matter. When I felt, that finding a feather was connected to my learning, it simply was.

About two years ago a dear friend of mine gifted me a beautiful purple flower, whilst we were journeying together beyond the veils. The flower was a gift from his heart and I felt its warmth and it filled my soul. I had felt lonely and abandoned for some time, restless and impatient. Although part of me knew about stillness and its powerful voice, another part of me felt like a tethered horse on the verge of going rampant. My thoughts and emotions were running high, memories of past hurts and old energies coming to the surface again. 
 
A few days after receiving this beautiful gift I went on another journey, once more travelling into the spirit realms. I love the Far North, the big ice and the cold. To me, walking through ice and snow is incredibly healing. So I journeyed through the icy tundra until my mind was empty of all thought. I had reached the point of complete exhaustion and could not take another step.

​While I was kneeling in the snow, I felt my body freezing and turning into ice, which was unusual because usually the cold would not affect me in any negative way. Then I realized why I had come. I had come to lose myself because I felt abandoned and alone. It was an old energy of mine, an old way of thinking. 

After a while I looked up. Where there had been an empty and vast field of ice and snow, a mountain had grown out of nowhere. There was no path leading up, but I would have to climb to reach the mountain top. The mountain was covered with ice and I was barefoot and wore no gloves. I felt something else and looked around.

My friend was with me. He was watching me quietly, observing. I looked at the mountain again. A thought occurred to me. I had become ice, void of warmth. I got up and touched the icy crust of the mountain. My hand and the ice became one. That was how I could climb the mountain. I started climbing without thinking, answering the challenge, no longer thinking about falling asleep in the snow. Hands and feet one with the ice as needed, separating from it while moving forward. I felt how tired I had let myself become by letting my emotions and thoughts getting out of balance and letting old energies back in. When I thought that I could not climb any further I reached the entrance to a cave. I stopped.

​I felt the presence of someone and knew that I would be welcome in the cave and that I would be perfectly save, but I also sensed that I would not be able to leave the cave again. I sent healing and light into the cave, thanked the one living in there for the offer of hospitality and continued climbing. When I reached the top of the mountain, I found myself on a small plateau. I looked down at myself and was surprised. My skin had taken on a strange bluish hue. I stumbled to the middle of the plateau and lit a fire. I sat down for a while. Then I saw another mountain in the distance. My friend had sat down by the fire as well, watching me. He did not say anything. 
 
Instead of staying on the mountain top I climbed down the mountain and went up the second mountain, becoming one with the ice again. By the time I reached the top of the second mountain, my heart no longer felt cold. I lit another fire on the mountain top and saw yet another mountain in the distance. My friend was still with me, not leaving my side. I faced the third mountain, reached its top and lit a third fire. There was a fourth mountain in the distance. And a fifth. I climbed them both. 

When I had lit the fifth fire, the tiny flame in my heart had become a fire filling my whole body. The ice, however, was not melting. I took a look around. The five mountains formed a perfect circle, each fire a beacon of light and warmth. My friend was still there, watching me patiently. I climbed down the mountain. When I reached the foot of the mountain, I had no energy left. I had started the journey to lose myself because I had felt completely alone. Now I realized that that was not who I was anymore. ​

I would not give up. Giving up was not even an option in my mind, the mere thought of it seemed foreign. I would reach the center of the circle of the five mountains. It was an absolute certainty. I did not know what was waiting for me there, but I would. I suddenly realized something else: My body had become transparent ice and instead of a heart, there was fire.

I began to crawl towards the center of the circle, dragging my body over the ice. The fire that had started as a tiny flame became a roaring blaze melting the ice that had been my body and something else was being burned away as well. Dark ashes still glowing on the outer parts were leaving me. They looked like the burning pages of a book. There was just one thought in my mind: I had to reach the center of the circle before I was gone completely and do whatever I had to do there. I would not have it any other way.

When I reached the middle of the circle, there was not much of me left. I took the flower my friend had given me out of the fire of my heart and planted it in the icy ground. I asked it to grow and bloom. Its gift would not be lost with me, but grow root and be a gift to everyone. Then the fire consumed my old self completely and something dark with it. It went down screaming. The flames calmed down and there I was, whole and unscathed.

I looked at my friend. He had been there the whole time, never leaving my side, despite feeling my emotions and looking at a part of mine that I had hidden in the shadows for no-one to see. He had not interfered or carried me up and down the mountains. He had known better than to do that. He had been there with me. He had never left. I had never been abandoned.

​I had no words. 

A few days after my journey my mother asked me if I would accompany her to Klagenfurt to visit one of her friends who was in hospital after surgery. We went to visit her. After having a nice time sitting outside and chatting with her friend, we walked her back to the hospital entrance. In one of the flower pots right outside the entrance I saw the same purple flower my friend had gifted me in the spirit realm. Then I knew why I was there and my mother’s friend and I had a healing ceremony. After that I asked my mother which kind of flower it was. An anemone. 
 
A purple anemone is an incredibly precious gift. Purple flowers are usually given to those respected because of their status or royalty. This is not the case, when it comes to anemones: Purple anemones are given to those who hold a place in your heart, your mind and your soul because of who they are in their heart and soul.

​They are gifted to people dear to you, that you have not seen in the physical realm for a while, letting them know that they have never left your thoughts. They are a token of protection for those who feel abandoned and vulnerable, letting them know that they are not alone and that you are with them in thought and spirit. 

Swans are the Guardians of the Gates and teach us about our roles as guardians in our lives, as custodians on Mother Earth and the Sea of Stars. They tell the stories of their own metamorphosis, like H. C. Andersen did in his fairy tale “The Ugly Duckling”. Swans do not know their own beauty. ​

Years ago, when I was engaged in an eight-month long battle for health, I went onto a journey beyond the veils. It simply happened. It was not a conscious decision. I was called and I followed the call.

I found myself standing at a crossroads. There were two paths. The right one was muddy, millions of footprints. I could see the setting sun in the distance, for there were no mountains, nothing obstructing my view. A path, millions had followed before me. I shook my head. I was not interested in following it.

Suddenly I found myself in the mountains. The fresh air filled my lungs and my heart remembered the days, when I had been in the mountains as a child. I had loved it. I saw the eagle in the distance and heard him calling again. I started walking through the trees, climbing over large boulders, thoroughly enjoying the moment. Then the eagle was gone and I was not in the mountains anymore, but walking through a forest of evergreens.

​I was not alone. An incredibly beautiful icy grey wolf was trotting beside me. We looked at each other and continued walking together in silence. No words needed to be spoken. The path was no longer a path of sharp-edged stones, but a path covered in the fallen needles of the evergreens that were standing tall around us.

Then my companion was gone and with him all the sounds of the forest. The singing of the birds had ceased and even the trees had fallen silent. I kept on walking and found myself facing a wall of darkness. Something started coming out of its depths. A pair of green eyes was staring straight into mine. I stood my ground. ​

The voice said, “What are you asking for?” I said, “I would like to heal.“ “Anything more you would like to ask for?” “I would like to learn.” And me being me I added, “But you know what? Please, don’t make it easy. Do not make it easy!” The voice started laughing. It was the kindest, most loving laughter I had ever heard. “That is you. That is typical of you.” I realized in that very moment, that I knew the voice and that I had been sitting on that clearing thousands of times before, talking to him. Then he said, “Is there anything else you would like to ask for?” Sadness started filling my heart. I had known that particular kind of sadness all my life. I stared into the fire. “I don’t want to be alone anymore.” “Turn around, there is someone waiting for you.”

I felt a presence behind me. I got afraid. It was not fear of whoever was standing there. It was fear of something else. It took a long time. I finally turned around. Right in front of me there was the most beautiful emerald green and purple snake I had ever seen. She came towards me, crawled up my right arm and went straight into my heart. The voice said, “You are never alone. You always have yourself.” I started crying, because I felt a kind of love I had never felt before.
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I found myself back in my living room, my face wet. I had been crying in the material realm, too. I hadn’t done that in years. My healing journey had begun.